Facing a Possible Recurrence

Life moves at a rapid pace and we forget the problems that have faced us over time. This winter has come in like a lion - throwing things at us before we have a chance to catch up. About two weeks ago, we noticed another lump on Arrow. This time it is on her elbow right below the radiation site. It looks suspicious and we have had conversations with our vet about how to proceed.

I am incredibly grateful that I have never had to deal with cancer myself or with Sally. If you know me, however, you know that I have spent time thinking about how I would deal with or approach different scenarios. For example, when Sally had a swollen lymph node for a few weeks, I had taken us down a dark road and lost sleep over it for several nights until it went away. I've also known that if diagnosed and successfully treated, I would have major anxiety attacks for at least the first five years, just before my yearly exams to detect recurrence. And this is how it feels with Arrow.

Knowing that she had a likely "high" grade tumor, we knew that the chances the tumor would return were good. We thought we could hold it off for a year with radiation. I really do feel like we kicked cancer's ass and that she isn't going to die from this cancer. But here we are with an ambiguous growth, that forces us to think about how we will handle a progressive cancer with our little doggie.

The choices aren't great. The "Odd looking spot of suspicious origin" (Sally's description, neither of us want to call it a tumor--let's call it Spot) is kind of small and so hard to aspirate for a biopsy. The vet could do surgery and remove Spot, but because it is right below the radiation site, the wound might have trouble healing. If it is a myxosarcoma, then part of her last few months will be recovering from a surgery that didn't really buy us time. Quality v. quantity. That's the decision. We could wait and see, but as the last tumor showed us, if it is more than Spot, this thing grows fast. So if we wait, then it will be pretty large and surgery might not be an option. Oh, the oncologist's words were something like, "If it is a recurrence, the surgical option is amputation." That doesn't sit well with either Sally or I (I don't think Arrow liked it either). We don't feel like leaving her with three legs, to extend her life for a few months is a great option.

As Sally said, the only thing we know that we HAVE to do is love her like its our job. Give her bones, and hot dogs. Give her belly rubs, nice walks, and time with her doggie friends. Sally and I will be processing this one a lot over the next couple of days to try and make a decision that is best for her (first) and us (second).

These pictures were taken on Christmas day. She doesn't look like a dog with cancer!